He'd Been Stopped
by nahtsea
Summary: When there's nothing left for Naruto to do, he does something desperate. angst, yaoi, rape, violence, suicidal tendencies .
1. He'd Been Stopped

He woke to beeping.

His head hurt and his body hurt, and he was so very tired, but the only thing he could think about was the incessant beeping that had woken him in the first place. He wanted to close his eyes and go back to sleep, but he couldn't let himself. He didn't know where he was, after all, nothing in his room beeped.

Groaning with the effort it took to turn his head, Uzumaki Naruto caught sight of his beautiful, pale lover. He was slouched in a chair, his raven-crowned head resting on the wall behind him. He looked like he hadn't had a chance to get a decent night's sleep, and Naruto hated that he probably knew the reason behind it. There was a curtain at the end of his bed, a high television silently playing some news show. His hands were covered in machinery, and the beeping was his heart monitor. He considered taking it off, but the resounding, shrill deadpan would kill him completely. They weren't in a private room. They weren't in a house. He couldn't remember leaving his home, much less the reason for waking up in this public hospital room. But he had no doubt about what had happened.

He'd been stopped.

"Good," Iruka murmured, pushing the privacy curtain open. "I see you've woken up."

Iruka wasn't his father, wasn't anyone but his guardian. He'd taken Naruto in when the blond was a teenager, relishing his trouble-maker attitude. Iruka claimed it was all only because Naruto needed attention, he'd been deprived of it as he grew up, and in the right kind of environment, he would grow out of it. What he hadn't known was that when Naruto did grow out of his trouble-making days, he'd fallen into a depression so deep, it was hard to make the blond even smile and mean it sometimes.

Naruto tried to speak, but his throat was horribly dry. It scratched, like he'd swallowed dry rice and it had all gone down horizontally. The only noise that came out of his mouth was a rough noise.

"That's the medicine you took. And the charcoal that we gave you to neutralize it," Iruka explained. He kept his dark eyes riveted to Naruto's own blue eyes as he shook the pale younger man awake.

"Wha...?" he asked incoherently. Dark eyes glanced around the room, stopping only when they met confused blue.

"Naruto," he breathed, pushing himself up to his feet.

"I'll get you some ice Naruto," Iruka murmured, turning to leave.

"Damnit Naruto," the pale man growled. He pushed a hand through his own dark hair before stepping up to Naruto's side. Uchiha Sasuke, Naruto's lover, was a lot of things. But he was never this emotional. And it was confusing. There were tears in his dark eyes, something that never should have been there, something he couldn't recall ever seeing. "What the fuck were you thinking?" he asked the normally tanned man. He ran a hand through Naruto's blond hair, letting it play in the soft strands. "You could have died, you fucking moron!" Sasuke shouted.

Naruto turned his head away from Sasuke as a tear broke free, sliding down his pale cheeks. It was... he couldn't watch the beautiful, powerful, strong Sasuke cry. He couldn't. And he couldn't explain why he'd done it either. He'd actually hoped to have died this time. And that just wasn't something you could explain to another person.

"You'll have to forgive him for not talking, Sasuke," Iruka murmured softly, pushing his way into the small room. "Everything has made his throat hurt, he's not going to be able to talk for just a little bit. I'm surprised he woke up this quickly though."

He handed the cup to Naruto, smiling sadly as he took the cup and threw back a couple of pieces of ice. He grimaced as they melted slowly, sending cool water sliding down his throat. The blond closed his blue eyes in relief. The cool water was perfect, just what he'd needed. And he was grateful to Iruka for giving it to him.

"Fuck you, Naruto," Sasuke growled. He stood and left the room quickly, and as much as Naruto wanted to run after him, he couldn't.

"You and I are going to talk. Sasuke needs to cool off, so let him go. But you and I are going to talk about what you've done," Iruka threatened.


	2. He's Back

"You and I are going to talk. Sasuke needs to cool off, so let him go. But you and I are going to talk about what you've done," Iruka threatened. "They want to put you in an institute," Iruka murmured softly. "They want to make sure that you get the proper health care. That you're mental health is stable. And they want to make sure nothing like before is happening again. And, at the moment, I have nothing to give them, I have nothing to offer to have you come back home with me. I don't know what's wrong, because you jumped off of the deep end on this one."

"It won't happen again," Naruto rasped, quickly swallowing more ice chips. He looked away from the chestnut haired man, and closed his eyes. He wasn't going to die any time soon, and it kind of upset him. "I'm tired."

"Sleep then," Iruka sighed. "But I want you to know that it was Sasuke who found you. Sasuke who saved your life. No matter how little value you place on your own life, remember that there are people who love you. And I have never seen Sasuke so emotional before."

With that, the older man took the cup of ice and sat it down behind Naruto, allowing the blond the chance to rest, if he wanted it. He said nothing else as he left the small room, leaving Naruto alone, yet again.

Naruto clenched his eyes shut, letting himself physically relax. The doctor's would come visit him if his heart monitor began to beat a different tempo. Alone, the shrill beeping was more noticeable, harder to ignore. He hated himself for failing, hated he couldn't even do that simple thing right. And he hated that it was Sasuke who had found him. He wanted to hate his lover for that, wanted to leave him, but he couldn't. He would cling to Sasuke for as long as he was alive.

He had a lot of explaining to do.

vvv

When he opened his eyes again, Sasuke was slumped in the chair again. He looked pissed, even while he was sleeping. It was Naruto's fault, he knew that, but he didn't know what he could do to try to make things better between them. Because if he was going to stay alive, he needed to have Sasuke at his side. It was desperate and foolish, but it was honest.

His throat didn't hurt so much anymore and he was grateful for it. He sat up and cleared his throat before calling Sasuke's name. Dark eyes blinked open slowly, and as cute as Sasuke was waking up, Naruto hated watching it turn to anger.

"Well?" he asked, straightening in the seat.

"I'm sorry," Naruto answered, bowing his head. In a sense he was. He just wasn't saying he what he was sorry for, exactly.

"You were so still," Sasuke whispered. He stood and sauntered gracefully to the blond's bedside. "I was afraid to touch you. It was like my family, all over again."

Naruto wrapped a hand around Sasuke's wrist. Pulling the slender boy forward, he wrapped his arms around his standing lover. "I'm sorry Sasuke," he whispered.

"Why'd you do it?" Sasuke asked. He climbed into the bed, sitting beside the blond. He adjusted, allowing himself to cling almost desperately to Naruto's body. "Why did you try to leave me?"

Naruto was surprised to feel the tears on his own cheeks. They were flowing freely as he held Sasuke. He wasn't supposed to cry. It wasn't an appropriate reaction. He needed to become stronger. "You wouldn't understand," Naruto answered. "And I can't explain it to you."

"Boys?" Iruka's voice interrupted.

He was kind enough to stand there for a few moments, allowing them to compose themselves. Although neither would ever admit to it, they were both proud, stubborn goats. Neither would want to be caught so emotionally vulnerable to an outsider. Satisfied, Iruka dragged the chair across the floor of the small space and sat down heavily. He was practically glaring at Naruto as he spoke softly, "The doctor's have ordered a mandatory seventy-two hour hold in St. Elizabeth's. They want to observe you."

Naruto nodded slowly. He moved his hand to Sasuke's, and held it, a tiny anchor in the sudden storm. "And afterwards?"

"You'll be released into my custody, and we will be making some changes. This will never happen again."

"Okay," Naruto sighed, sounding for all the world to hear like a chastised teenager.

"Now, tell me the truth and explain why you tried to kill yourself in our home. What happened?"

Naruto's grip on Sasuke's hand tightened painfully, and he laid his head on the closest shoulder. "You wouldn't understand."

"You've already said that. Now tell us the truth," Sasuke growled.

"Because I wanted to get away from _him._ And I know that he won't follow me. He's too much of a coward to think about it."

"Who?" Iruka asked softly. He wanted to be the one who was holding Naruto, but it was Sasuke's job as Naruto's boyfriend.

"Why are you so scared of him?" Sasuke asked quietly after a long silence.

"I'm not scared," Naruto grumbled. Shifting on the bed, he let Sasuke lay against him, holding him as best as he could.

"If you aren't scared of him, then why did you try to kill yourself?" Iruka asked, cutting off any potential argument between the boys about it.

Naruto smiled, a sad smile that made Iruka want to cry. Sasuke didn't see it luckily because he was leaning against Naruto, face pointed toward the older man in the room. "It's not important."

"Bullshit," Sasuke growled as his elbow acquainted itself with Naruto's gut. "What's his name?"

Lost blue eyes stared into Iruka's dark eyes. The older man was torn. He wanted to tell Naruto that it would be okay, that he would protect him, but he couldn't do it. He couldn't lie to Naruto because Naruto had put himself into this situation. "Naruto," he sighed softly. "You need to answer."

"His name is Orochimaru," Naruto answered faintly.

"He's back in town?" Iruka growled, standing up.

"Who is that?" Sasuke asked, turning to face the blond behind him.

"It's... The bastard was Naruto's last foster father. But he's a disgusting bastard," Iruka spat.

Sasuke looked confused but didn't say anything. All he knew was that the blond was Iruka's foster son. He didn't know much else about how Naruto had grown up because he knew Naruto didn't like to talk about his past. And Naruto didn't know everything about Sasuke's past either. All the boys knew was that they needed each other and would protect each other, no matter what.

"What happened?" Sasuke asked softly, letting his confusion sound in his voice.

"Don't worry about it," Iruka murmured softly. He placed a heavy hand on Naruto's blond head, running it through the soft strands as lovingly as he could. He wanted to protect Naruto as much as possible, even though he knew it was pointless. He couldn't be with Naruto all day every day. But he had to do something to make Orochimaru leave again.

"Iruka," Naruto whispered, cuddling against Sasuke.

"How did you find out?" Iruka asked softly. His voice was cold steel, leaving no room for arguments, or options for not answering.

"He paid me a visit," Naruto whispered against Sasuke's shoulder.

vvv

Thank you for reading, I am overwhelmed by the response to this story, and I'm just grateful that people like it. Particular thanks to usagi1515, The Flaming Hyperbole, and xxemogoddessxx for you wonderful reviews!


	3. He'd Been Hurt

"He paid me a visit."

"Fuck," Iruka cursed, beating his fist against the mattress. "Did he...?"

"No," Naruto answered quickly, shaking his head negatively. He pressed himself closer to Sasuke. "He just wanted to talk."

"It's time to tell Sasuke about Orochimaru," Iruka sighed. "Especially considering the fact that his talking to you sent you to this."

"Can we be alone?" Naruto asked in a whimper.

"I love you Naruto," Iruka sighed, pressing a soft kiss to the blond's forehead. "I'm going to get something to drink, do you want more ice chips?"

Naruto nodded and Iruka left the room quickly. Sasuke could only watch it all. In the years that he'd known Iruka, Sasuke had never seen the older man so close to losing control over his anger. Naruto's arms wrapped around Sasuke's body, holding him as tightly as he could. The heart monitor's tempo accelerated as it sounded it's shrill alarm in the quiet room.

"Tell me about him?" Sasuke asked quietly.

"He was my foster father from when I was twelve to fourteen. At fourteen, Iruka took me in. Orochimaru is a very smart man, but he's evil. He's very wealthy, and he does a lot of really good things in the business and medical fields. But personally, he's a fucking asshole," Naruto laughed softly.

The blond sighed as he pushed Sasuke away from him. It would be okay if Naruto was left alone again. If he was, then he could die next time. And besides, why would somebody want to stay with a man who'd been raped, who'd been used as a toy? Naruto licked his lips and looked sadly at his pale lover.

"He likes children. They excite him. He thinks they are some of the best things in the world. And he tries everything he can to ruin them. It's a game to him. He wants to see children cry, to see them begging him to stop," Naruto whispered. "And I was a child while I was with him."

"D-did he?" Sasuke asked.

"He raped me. He fucked me. He beat me and used me however he saw fit. Nothing I wanted or thought held any sway on him. Not until I found Iruka."

Sasuke's dark eyes closed and his head bowed as he tried to digest what he'd heard. It wasn't possible, not with somebody as vivacious and beautiful and usually so full of life. Naruto didn't seem like the kind of person who had to suffer with that. Sasuke found he was disgusted.

"You don't have to stay if you don't want to," Naruto sighed, lifting his tired blue eyes to Sasuke's. "I won't stop you if you want to leave."

"Naruto," Sasuke whispered. He was torn. It was hard to digest. It was a new understanding, a new complex to their relationship. He wouldn't leave Naruto because of that. The blond had had no control over what the bastard did. Nothing was his fault.

He pulled his lover close, holding him. He buried his pale hands in Naruto's hair, stroking the golden locks lovingly. Naruto was his lover, his partner. He wouldn't abandon him, now now when he needed Sasuke the most. Naruto's arms wrapped painfully tight around Sasuke's waist, and the Uchiha was surprised to feel Naruto's body trembling in his grasp.

"I love you Sasuke," Naruto whispered finally. He dug his nails into Sasuke's shirt as he held onto the other, refusing to let him go.

"When you saw him, what did he say?" Sasuke asked, proud his voice didn't tremble.

He never said those three words aloud. It was something that they both understood. Sasuke was emotionally stunted, but wouldn't talk about it. Naruto was much friendlier, but wouldn't go overboard. And the blond was a master at understanding Sasuke's silent words, his body language. The Uchiha didn't say his love, he proved it. And by sticking around, by just holding Naruto, it was enough. The blond would understand.

"He said he wanted me back. He said my ass was perfect and he missed fucking me. And he told me that he was going to get rid of Iruka so I could go back to him."

"You're an adult. You could leave Iruka if you wanted to. He can't hurt you," Sasuke murmured.

"But if I don't go back to him, he'll hurt Iruka. And I don't want that," Naruto whispered.

"But I won't let you go," Sasuke answered. He tightened his hold on the blond and laid his head down. Naruto wasn't going to go back to that, not if Sasuke had anything to say about it. Not if he could try to save his lover. And no matter what, he was determined to save Naruto, to get him past these terrible memories again.

vvvv

Thank you for reading and continuing to support my story. Particular thanks goes out to: ann, bluedemon92, TheFlamingHyperbole, and xxemogoddessxx


End file.
